I'm starting to get nasty emails again. That must mean it's time to update the blog. I've been getting a ton of Facebook stuff. I'm just not feeling the love. I'm also not feeling very funny lately. I found my BYU box. Dang I was funny. I was also footloose and fancy free. I'll post this weekend. I've got a draft going. Don't despair.

How are we all on costumes? I am making all but one of the kids costumes this year. Let me tell you, it is NOT cheaper to make them yourselves! Willow is going to be Cleaopatra, Poppy is going to be the Snow Queen, Phoeinx a hotdog or hamburger (he hasn't decided), and Lily is going to be a packet of ketchup. I love Halloween. It's my favorite holiday. If I were going to have a party... it would be a killer Annual Halloween Party. But since I don't have parties I guess you'll never know how cool it coulda been. You say Meliss why don't you have parties? Well I'll tell you why:

Picture it, Hemet about 4 years ago,(I miss the Golden Girls) my sister-in-law says lets have a party. I said, "sure" we can do it at my house. It was one of those parties where you go to buy stuff. You know the kind, we mormon women love to have them, where you go to buy something from someone else because they bought what you were selling. Pampered Chef, Southern Living, Cookie Lee, Layers, you name it we sell it. I made out the invitations, I sent out what seemed like a thousand, and I made the calls the day of. I cleaned my house. I STAYED home from teaching school that day to clean my house and set up. I made a spread of goodies to eat both savory and sweet. My sister in law invited her friends from work and we waited. The first hour passes and I thought oh everyone is late, the second hour passed and I thought did I put the wrong date on the invite? Then the third hour passed and I realized I was a looser. Soooo sad. I know you are laughing now and I know that most of you would say you are laughing with me and not at me, but it really wasn't funny. Therefore I avoid having parties. I haven't had anything here in Corona most of the ward hasn't even been in the house. I can count on my hand the number of people who have. Yep I'm a looser it's official.

Fat Lady Store

If you shop at a fat lady store does that mean you're fat? (That was retorical, please don't answer.)I am so tired of trying to find the one 14 that Gap stocks. Or the Large at Banana Republic, I hate that the cut of the clothing is for someone who is a size 2. Do we not know that what works on a 2 will not work on a 14 even if it will button or zip? I am also sick of having two choices: youth-I'm 35 and trying to wear stuff that my 7 year old has on, or women-I'm 80 and think sequin needs to be on everything including t-shirts. So I put myself on a mission... find some stuff that fits, and that is comfortable. Notice I have given up on looking good. You'd think that I could at least find the other two. Nope. For a country that has a lot of obese, over weight people we sure do have a ton of retail stores that don't carry ANYTHING for our GROWING public. (Pun intended)Here's a news flash; the reason the retail market is going into the toilet isn't because of the economy it's because size 2 girls are 14-16yrs old and they can't afford to buy 95$ jeans. I'm 35 and I can... but do you think I can find any? I practically begged for someone to take my money, but alas you can only get size 12 and 14 online. Do they know why? Because the 2 they stocked were bought in the first 10 minutes they were out! I finally decided I was going to a PLUS SIZE STORE. They carry size 12-really big mama. since when is 12 a plus size?
So I went down to Lane Bryant to do my buisiness. You see I much prefer buying clothing for my children. They never look fat in anything. Their crack never hangs out of "super low rise" jeans. (Who wears those anyway?!!!) They never have to unbutton the top button because of bloating. And finally they never need to wear 15 layers underneath to cover or uncover their large white panties. The last time I bought something for myself was at Sam's Club. If you are not familiar with Sam's or Costco please GET OFF MY BLOG. There were some stretchy skirts for a bargain so I bought one in each color. My sister-in-law said aren't you going to try them on? I said, "NOPE".

Anyway heres how it went. I tried on every pair of pants in the store (like 27) I think I finally know what size I am. Between not shopping, babies, and (GOd's gift to women like me) sweat pants, I had no clue what size I should even be looking at. I went to Lane Bryant and was I amazed at what great things they have. All the clothes in there were modest. I didn't have to think about what I could wear under anything to make it "work". The pants cover my large behind without showing 10 inches of crack. I can honestly say I have never been so pleasantly surprised at how many great choices I had...

SO to all you SKINNY girls. Hope that camisole, t-shirt, belly band, and belt work for you... Oh and by the way your G's are still hanging out.

I'm going to have a mint and chocolate chip milkshake so that I can still wear Lane Bryant clothes another day.

Theeeeey're Baaaaack

This is so pathetic. Only those who are VERY intimate with me know this fact. I love dolls. I always have. When I was a little girl I always had one with me. This love has carried on. I look at dolls online all the time, in fact I have a whole folder in "My Favorites" with just dolls in it. My aunt Ione makes porcelain dolls and I made a few. I have made vinyl dolls. Anyway long story longer I have been collecting the Madame Alexander dolls from McDonalds Happy Meals since they came out. I have them all and they are out again. Here they are.

Blah blah

I know that I have not put any interesting blogs up in a while. The family picture is cute but seeing it day after day gets annoying, I know. Here's the deal. I really haven't done anything interesting in the last little while. My kids are all home (off track) and bugging the crap outa me. My mom and dad are home... and Dave is working and resting. That leaves me doing the mom thing.
I have the funniest idea for a blog and I know that you all will peee in your large white panties when you read it, but I need some pictures in a college scrapbook. And well frankly I have no idea where that freakin' box is. It could be at the in-laws in our pile of junk in their garage or it could be hiding somewhere here in our junk. It could have even been canabalized by the other unfinished scrapbooks loaded in the bookshelf. Anyway I need to scan the pictures chronicalling (whatever&@$@!!&^%)the event. Here's a little tid bit. It involves costumes, BYU, the Provo/University police department, and my friend Dr. Ward. Intriguing isn't it? But until then you will have to stare at boring pictures of us.

Davey and Lily (Does this make you nervous or is it just me?)

Here we are. Aren't we cute?

This is the REAL Taylor Family

Okay so Dave posted the other picture and while it's fine for a hallway hanging, home teacher Christmas card, it's not the REAL picture. This is the real picture and actually if you want to be truthfull it's got all the elements. Tim is playing the super hero (he has a superman complex). Aleca looks like she has wings. Dave is trying really hard to forget where he is at the moment, Greg's smiling like he's the only normal one(in your dreams Gardner). Catherine and I look like we are a few sandwiches short of a picnic, and we'll just leave it at that. I love it. It's the only shot where we are all looking at the camera and where we are all enjoying ourselves.

What was Dave thinking when he posted the other one? He has been a little off lately... maybe he forgot who he married and what married into.

The Taylors